thoughts

There's a Chris Tomlin song that's been on my heart.  It's called "Lord I need You".  The whole song speaks to my heart, but verse 2 and the bridge really stick in my mind:

Verse 2:
Where sin runs deep, Your grace is more
Where grace is found is where You are
And where You are Lord I am free
Holiness is Christ in me
Yes where You are Lord I am free
Holiness is Christ in me

Bridge:
So teach my song to rise to You
When temptation comes my way
And when I cannot stand I'll fall on You
Jesus You're my hope and stay
And when I cannot stand I'll fall on You
Jesus You're my hope and stay

Recently, I've been struggling with some hard emotions.  I tend to turn emotion off so I don't have to deal with the "heart issues".  I'm finding that in His grace and mercy, God doesn't want me to live like that.  So, very gently and quietly and slowly, He has been changing my heart, one hidden emotion and feeling at a time.  I don't want to let go of some things.  I'd rather let them stay in their dark crevice, gathering mold and dust bunnies and cobwebs.  I'd like to forget they're there.  Sometimes I don't want to let go of some things because I'm "not done with it yet".  The Lord is showing me that in either case, I have to let go.  I have to lay it at His feet.

That's why I love this song.  As I work through these hard emotions, this song reminds me that grace is found in the middle of sin.  God's love and mercy are found in the middle of sin.   And when I can't stand in the middle of trials and tribulations, I can lean on the Lord because He is my hope and stay.